there are some days where i’ll be lucky if i have time to hear the voice of my thoughts.. but on days like this, i can reflect on myself and where i am, and today… i feel myself making steps towards becoming more responsible, more independent.. evolving into this woman that’s an in-between with where i want to be and where i need to be… not in any form with the clothes i wear.. or the way i speak.. or move.. but the actions i take that provide stability in this thing called strength.. sacrifices coming round to inching me more towards that “where do i see myself in five years” kind of life…..i have this vision for myself where the things i valued before have no room to exist any longer and the things i never thought i would value are now my main thought… and it’s been so hard, you know… trying to just get to the surface, with many days where i ask myself why am i even doing this? but i know this answer.. i’ve repeated this answer many times.. i’m doing this for me.  
For the first time.. i feel this progress..and it feels good. man, it feels so good.
thankful to God for giving me the strength to smile in the midst of it all. 

freeddwaits:

I’ve thanked God for her and asked for his assistance to keep her as happy as she makes me.  Through her eyes, I see the world in a different light…where before I could care less about anything until it affected me, she analyzes every thing from small to large breaking into a better understanding of it.  When we’re arguing, I feel sick to my stomach.  She makes me rethink every selfish thing I thought was embedded in me.  That unconditional love I always said I wanted to see…she shows me that.  I have so much emotion and feeling for this one woman that I’ve cried because of it…the only other woman/person I’ve done that for is my mother.  Her happiness and laughter is now life for me.  I’d do anything possible for her.  I love her…..of course, I love you.  Don’t ever doubt my feelings…they’re the most genuine part of me, I can’t control them.  I’m ready for those hard times which I never endured…teach me what you know.  Wisdom only comes with age when you’ve chosen to make yourself wise in a matter…I’m a runner in that instance, so please teach me with understanding and patience.

my heart did this thing when i read this.. where all the blood rushed to it and made it go insane.. it’s funny because just earlier today my heart was racing from that first argument we had.. but isn’t that what love is? being able to get through the inevitable yet ‘god forbid’ hard times and overcome it feeling more in love with the person than before.. because that’s how i feel right now..
…i’m so in love with you.

“You’ll be jealous of everyone who’s more successful than you. That’s okay. Just transfer that jealousy into something productive, like working really hard so you can one day eclipse them and make them feel jealous of YOU.”

everything here just hit home to me.. i’m glad i came across this.
note to self. 

real people aren’t perfect; perfect people aren’t real.